By Amy McCollom
There are times that I pray so hard for that one big thing. But sometimes deep in my soul, I feel a foreboding that I already know what the answer will be; and the answer is no. Is that doubt? There were times that I was so sure a prayer would be answered that I went ahead and made plans to go forward. But the answer was no. I was stunned and in shock. I got mad at God for a minute. But in the quiet of the night when I was done complaining, God spoke to my mind and reminded me that He made the universe and all the heavens and the earth and everyone of us, and that He knew my disappointment, but He was still in control.
Like the children that we are, we stomp our emotional feet and cry out all we want when things in this world do not go our way, but God is wise and just and kind. He gives us space, sends us people to cross our paths to comfort us, and if we listen, He will speak to us directly.
This week we lost our friend Jason Milner, quite suddenly. No one expected this 34 year old man to get this sick, this fast, and not recover. No one would have imagined last week that we would be attending his funeral this Sunday. He has 2 young boys who I taught in Sunday School. My husband is their Sunday School teacher now. We love these boys, and their dad. They are like an extension of our own family. My husband had spent a lot of time talking with Jason, giving counsel and advice, and we always tried to help that little family in any way we could. They are really special to us.
Everyone from our church and that I knew prayed fervently for Jason to live. Still, God said no. My heart cried out WHY?! But before it could finish, God had hushed me quiet.
“I am the Great I Am. My ways are above your ways. Everyday I answer 10,000 tiny prayers for you, but this one…this one isn’t just about you.”
That is what I heard God say to me. Instantly I understood what He meant. It helped me, and it did give me comfort. God has a master plan that we know nothing about. Each person touches so many other people’s lives. We were all put on this earth, given a certain amount of days, given a job to do, and then we are called home. We have to trust God that Jason’s job here on earth was complete. That through what he started on earth, and through the lives he touched, God will continue a work that will prosper. I know Jason loved God and always wanted to do the right thing. He was kind and loving and funny and we will miss him greatly. I wish he could have stayed longer, but. Who am I to say that God doesn’t have perfect timing? God, help our hurting hearts.
God said he answered 10,000 tiny prayers for me, and I feel so ungrateful. Have I thanked God enough for all He has done for me? Have I really been thankful or do I just expect Him to perform His “duty” like a bratty teenage kid of a rich parent. I need to repent.
God really does answer 10,000 tiny prayers for me…God help me find my keys, God help me get a good parking place, Lord keep my kids safe, Jesus please let this be on sale, God don’t let the grinding sound be the washing machine, Lord Jesus please don’t let me run out of gas…..
What about you? Are you also guilty of that too? Perhaps not being thankful enough for the many things God has done for you? It’s easy to take things for granted when everything is going right. That’s why we think the world has come to an end when the power goes off or our water gets turned off for a little while. We are indeed a spoiled generation. We need to be so thankful.
God doesn’t mind if we ask 10,000 tiny prayers, in fact He said for us to pray continually. He desires for us to communicate with Him at all times. Don’t make it weird by being distant. I taught in my Sunday School class an easy way to start to pray is to use the letters as a guide. P – Praise God R – Repent to God A – Ask God Y – Yield to God
A prayer doesn’t have to be long and eloquent. Just talk like you are speaking to a grandfather.
In closing, I want to say do not take anything for granted; your friends, family, home, job, children, vehicle, pets, life….it can all be gone in one heartbeat. Life is so short. Decide what is most important to you now, and pour everything you have into it. Hopefully that is God and family first. I know it was for Jason. I will see you on the other side, brother.